Coffee. It's an addiction isn't it? Every single day millions of adult Americans cannot go to work or wake up completely unless they have their fill of coffee, and though scientists have stated caffeine is bad for us, we're creatures of habit. One of these habits is trying new things. That's where "We Hardly Brew Ye" comes in. "Hardly Brew Ye" thrives on a gimmick of sorts; they not only offer the normal everyday things that other shops offer, like pastries and CD samplers but they also have one very special thing: Their coffee is made from the ashes of dead people. That's right. Coffee has become such an increasing addiction that people actually dedicate their bodies to the industry after they die. But there's a method to their madness. Obviously real beans are used for the coffee itself, just like traditional coffee shops, but if you want to bring your loved ones ashes in, they will make the coffee right there in front of you, brewed to perfection with those very ashes. We spoke to the owner, who said his idea came from the old belief that you can always be together as one, if you're a literal part of eachother. Romantic? Certainly. Sweet? Sure. A bit creepy? Absolutely. But "Hardly Brew Ye" is quickly becoming one of the most well known shops in town. Not just because of it's gimmick but the coffee just ain't half bad. Owner Ron says he was "astonished" by how quickly the idea caught on, and that the health board hasn't stepped in to stop him yet. People have even sent him cards saying he is doing Gods work by allowing them to be with their loved ones for just one more bathroom trip. Ron even said to one interviewer: "It's not really about the coffee. It's about togetherness. That's what coffee shops used to be about. Being together. Community and harmony." In just under a few short weeks, Ron has made 2.8 million dollars in revenue, and has even started selling T-shirts his son prints in the back of the store, with the slogan, "We Put 'Em In The Grounds". Yes it's a thriving operation, and we can expect this happy little place to be up and running for years to come. Peter Cushing, 47 Writer of the "Eating While Sad" column & lamp enthusiast
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May 2018
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